Month: February 2026

My mother was a fierce competitor.  She won countless tournaments, not only in basketball but also in tennis and golf.  On top of all that, she was her high school’s valedictorian and a bridge champion.

Living with a genius every day can be challenging.  By the time I learned to tie my shoes, I realized that I would never be as smart as my mom.  She was truly one of a kind, and Dad and I felt lucky to be in her orbit.

Dad once said, “The smartest thing I ever did was marry your Mom because she was smart!!!”  He would laugh every time he repeated the phrase.  Truth be told, he had so much common sense that she was able to stay home with her children her entire life.  Dad knew how to work hard and treat folks well. 

My brother and I would often wonder, “How did they ever get together?  They are so different!”  But as the saying goes, opposites can attract.    And anyone who knew our parents could see that was true.

I love sports, but when I find myself playing golf and the little white ball doesn’t go in the direction I want, I can throw a hissy fit.  In those moments, I hear a voice from above admonishing me.  It’s Mom, shaking her head in disgust.  “Lynn, behave!  It’s not about winning; it’s about how you play the game.” 

The competitor

Mom excelled at all games.  She never lost her composure and always remained calm enough to correct her mistakes and continue playing without any outbursts.

I may not be very smart, but I have improved my temper control.  I realized that I could easily upset those who played with me.  Additionally, I was growing tired of the judgmental gaze from above.

I’ve been thinking, which you know is dangerous.  Mama was right about many things in life.  Living a full life is about how we play the game.  Are we willing to lose in order to win?  Can we sacrifice our gratification for the benefit of others?

In golf, there are so many rules that most players don’t know or understand half of them.  If you cheat by moving the ball forward or improving your lie, your score will be affected.  But what if you moved the ball and no one saw you?  Your score might improve, but in that case, you lost the true essence of the game. 

Our children are growing up in a highly competitive world where there is often little time for play and imagination.  Achievement in various areas is frequently seen as the ultimate goal.  However, if we do not teach our children that acquiring success without humility and understanding is worse than failing, we all miss the mark.  By often prioritizing creativity over competition, we may help our children thrive and flourish in the future

Young children often cry when they do not win the prize, and some adults still do.  In our current society, there is a significant focus on winning, but true success comes from participating in the game with composure and grace.  

We tell our children not to bully, not to lie, not to demean others – yet every election season we reward adults who do exactly that.  If we cheer cruelty because it advances our side, we are teaching the next generation that winning matters more than integrity.  And that lesson will cost us.

How you win

After the Super Bowl, Seahawks coach Mike Macdonald was asked, “Do you ever yell at your players?  His response was, “No, I am not a yeller.” This approach may have contributed to their victory. Coach Macdonald proved you can triumph without yelling … that dignity still works.  Intelligence and control led them to win the big game, a gigantic ring, and a shiny trophy.   

To be a champion in life, one must embrace the values of human kindness.   We are not true champions when we degrade others to achieve success.  A CEO is not successful if he belittles his subordinates.  He may increase his wealth, but not without a price.  

Toward the end of my mother’s life, I asked her what she thought about God.  She never spoke openly about her faith, and even though we attended church, she kept her beliefs very private.

“Well, I don’t know what to tell you other than I hope I pleased the Lord.    I never judged anyone and believed in fairness.  I think I played the game well.”

Initially, I found the response puzzling, but I soon realized it encapsulates the essence of life: to please the Lord by navigating our journey with integrity, kindness, and respect.  This is the path we can all take to achieve true victory.

Thanks, Mom!

A dense fog rises from the nearby river as the sun sets in the west.   Those returning home from work turn on their dim lights to navigate through the haze.  By the time they reach their destinations,  the eerie fog lifts, revealing beautiful shades of pink streaking across a clearing sky.

While Mother Nature oversees those fog-filled hours, she is not the captain of the moral fog that can envelop the best of us.  How many times in our lives have we questioned our moral decisions?  Our conscience tells us that what we are doing is wrong, yet we continue to defend ourselves as we attempt to turn wrong into right. 

We have now entered a moral fog that obscures our vision and often takes us far away from home.  We know deep within our souls that staying in an immoral dilemma yields no rewards and no clear skies.

 Most of us are simply tired…tired of watching right and wrong dissolve into explanation.   We are weary of truth being continually blurred, softened, or framed in the name of neutrality, politeness, or balance.  This absence of clarity diminishes our courage and resolve.

When blame replaces accountability, we remain in the darkness.   Our finger-pointing is making our noses look like Pinocchio’s because it seems easier to fabricate a story than to admit defeat.  

Now, what do you say?

Where has the phrase “I am sorry” gone?  Do we not recall the question our parents would ask: “Now, what do you say?” after we had done something wrong?  A corner awaited me if I refused to say those three precious words.  “I am sorry” is as important as “I love you.” When we humble ourselves to admit our mistakes and truly mean it, we are expressing love.

Somewhere along the way, politics began redefining moral character. When both sides of the political spectrum fail to display honesty in their pursuit of power, they become so lost in confusion that they can’t find their way to the Capitol!

 When we encounter issues in political office or even in our own backyards, we often hear phrases like, “I know this is wrong, but look at this or that.” The reality is, if something is wrong, it remains wrong, regardless of circumstances.  Another common excuse is, “Well, look at the good they did!” Yes, but just like when I was a child—eating all my food didn’t excuse the time I threw my spinach on the floor.

Moral fog does not come from disagreement; it comes from the refusal to say when something is wrong.  Good character is built on honesty, transparency, bravery, and being true to ourselves.  

It’s important for us to be strong enough to confront the truth, both in the political landscape and in our personal lives.  We need to put aside conspiracy theories, let go of distrust, and demand facts and legitimacy.  When excuses are offered, let’s recall our childhoods and the times we tried to use those familiar lines, like “The dog really ate my homework!” It was tough to convince my parents when we only had a cat.

Clarity

We must clear the air and start calling a ‘spade a spade,’ as my father used to say.  The truth is this:  Racism is never acceptable.  Neither is gun violence, bullying, lying, stealing, cheating, or simple meanness.  These aren’t complicated moral questions, yet we often treat them as if they are.  Too often, we step around these truths not because we don’t recognize them, but because we’re not brave enough to say them out loud.

Clarity becomes clearer when we use God as our guide.  He is the only one who can judge, forgive our sins, and clear away the fog that clouds our understanding.  We must listen to His guidance at our dinner tables and within our society, and our representatives should follow His lead in the halls of our Capitol.  No political party has God’s favor; rather, it is individuals who do.  He judges us not as a group, but as unique souls.  In other words, He resides on each person’s shoulder, guiding us toward blue skies.

It takes a strong backbone to stand tall in character.  In the end, that will be what matters for us: did we stand firm for God, or did we falter for human approval?  What is right, and what is wrong?

Let the fog lift, and may the light of truth and bravery shine brightly enough to guide us home.

“In matters of conscience, the law of the majority has no place.” Mahatma Gandhi